do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
