Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
