Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
