May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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