i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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