Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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