something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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