this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
