I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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