omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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