so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
