sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
