I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
