He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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