No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize