the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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