Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
