Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
