We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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