don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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