just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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