Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
