fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
