dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
