well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize