Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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