Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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