how can u be prego again
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
