I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize