lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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