I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize