Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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