My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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