Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
he had hair everywhere except his balls
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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