I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
