i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
