NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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