lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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