Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
