Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Randomize
