physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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