I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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