well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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