yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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