Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Welp...herpes.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she smelled like a LAN party
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
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