Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
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