He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
