STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
as a side note pls kill me
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
