she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
