Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize